I woke up the next morning with a sore neck and Charles snoring lightly in my ear. I checked the time on my phone. 9:26. We had about seven hours before our appointment with Dr. Lee. I hoisted myself groggily to my feet and made my way to the shower.
I was in my room getting dressed when I heard footsteps pounding down the hallway. My door burst open - I hadn't bothered to lock it - and Charles stood there panting while I hastily pulled on a pair of jeans. "Charles, what are you doing?" I demanded.
"You weren't out there," he managed through gasps. "I'm sorry. I- I'm sorry; I didn't know you were gone."
Equal parts guilt and pity washed through me. I shouldn't have pushed my luck assuming he'd stay asleep. "No," I confessed, "I'm sorry." I motioned for him to have a seat on my bed. He sat down and put his face in his hands, still breathing heavily.
"I don't know what to do," he murmured into his palms.
Thinking he might start crying again, I sat down next to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "We'll figure it out," I assured him. "We will."
It took some convincing, but I managed to get Charles to eat some breakfast, and we avoided the rest of the day at the park. I purposefully steered us towards the ducks Charles had been watching the last time we were here, but he didn't show any interest. His eyes fell straight through the lake.
"Charles," I prompted, "you're going to be fine."
"Maybe," he offered softly.
I didn't press the issue; we stayed there until it was time for his appointment.
Dr. Lee greeted us again in his ivory office and asked how we'd been. Charles wouldn't even look at him. "Fine," I lied.
Dr. Lee looked skeptical. "Charles," he asked, "would you mind retiring to the waiting room for a few minutes? I'd like to try a little exercise."
Charles' eyes shot to mine, panicked. I tried to mask my own apprehension and gave him what I hoped was a reassuring nod.
"Thank you, Charles," Dr. Lee declared as Charles shuffled nervously out of the room. I saw him look back at me just as Dr. Lee was shutting the door.
"Adam," Dr. Lee continued, "I want to stress to you how important it is for me to have your complete honesty in this situation."
I nodded, looking down at his desk.
"I don't want to cast him in a bad light, but I can't count on Charles to give me the full story; as it is, he's already fairly resistant in our sessions. I need you to be the one who shows him that I'm here to help. Doing so will help me, it will help Charles, everyone will benefit."
He watched me, waiting for a response, but just as I was about to answer, there was a loud thump and a frightened shout from the other side of the door, "Doctor!"
Alarmed, Dr. Lee and I looked at each other and dashed out of his office. We turned the corner into the waiting room to see Charles being restrained by a security guard and flailing away from a fist-sized hole in the wall. The security guard was shouting instructions which were lost beneath Charles' terrified shrieks.
I ran to Charles, putting myself between him and the wall, and tried to talk him down. Seeing me, his cries dropped off quickly, becoming light whimpers, aftershocks of fear.
With the security guard maintaining a solid hold on Charles, Dr. Lee approached. "Charles," he offered in a calming voice, "tell me what happened."
Charles broke down, deflating in the security guard's arms. Dr. Lee motioned for the guard to release him, and he let Charles drop gently to the floor. Charles lay curled on his side, crying softly.
Dr. Lee gave me a stern glance then turned to the receptionist. "Call an ambulance."
I began to object, but Dr. Lee cut me off. "He needs to be taken to a professional facility."
It would have done no good to argue. I sat down next to Charles and put a hand on his arm; I stayed with him until the paramedics took him away.
Driving home under a dismal sunset, I couldn't help thinking of how much had changed in the last six days. What Charles and I shared hadn't been the same as it had back in school, of course, but we had recaptured something special, something that reminded me of what had made us so close in the first place. For as much as Charles' appearance had disrupted my life, I was glad for his return; in certain moments, it was the happiest I'd felt in a long time.
I knew I could go visit him and that he would eventually be released and we could still see each other every day, but I knew also that things had changed again. I wasn't able to save him. I didn't think he would blame me for that, but the entire dynamic of our relationship had shifted in a way that couldn't be reversed. By the time I got home, I was weary from thinking about it.
I looked around my apartment: the couch where Charles had slept, the table where we'd eaten together. I could already feel his absence. He'd been here for not quite a week, but he'd already changed it all. The space was as empty as it had always been, but I felt more alone now, like this place wasn't supposed to be this lonely, this empty. I crossed to the couch but just stared at it, didn't bother sitting down. It wasn't the same now, not the way it should be.
There were other places to go, places that were supposed to be as empty as it felt here, but this wasn't one. I didn't sit down.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Monday, September 6, 2010
Chapter Twenty-Nine
I rushed to the door and picked up the phone, hanging it up inside and taking a quick look around in case Charles was still there. The place was empty. I ran back out to my car.
I drove to the grocery store as fast as I could without risking being pulled over; it was the only store I could think Charles had meant to tell me he was at. I found him in the bakery section; he appeared to be counting doughnuts.
I slowed as I approached him, but my arrival still seemed to throw him. His look of recognition upon seeing me was followed quickly by a slight wobble and an expression of what looked like nausea. Suddenly, he put one hand on the pastry counter for support and dropped to the floor. He landed sitting, and I rushed over to kneel beside him.
"Charles," I whispered, trying not to draw attention. "Charles, are you okay?"
He was crying softly and trying to hide it. "I'm-" He took a long pause. "I'm here."
I didn't know what he meant by that, wasn't even sure he knew. "Charles, come on, we've got to get up." He allowed me to help him to his feet, allowed me to walk him out the door, but none of it could have been called a decision on his part. I felt like a puppeteer.
We drove back in silence until Charles offered meekly, "They only come around when you're not there."
I glanced over at him. "What?"
"The only time I see them now is when you're not with me."
I didn't know how to respond, and we drove the rest of the way in silence.
I was afraid Charles wouldn't want to come back inside, but he didn't make any effort to avoid it. When I tried to leave for my room, though, he grabbed my arm.
"Wait," he pleaded. I turned around and saw dread in his eyes. "Please," he added.
I nodded, understanding. I couldn't leave him alone now, at least not this soon after another incident. Charles sat back down on the couch; I switched the television on.
I sat down on the floor next to him, taking in these newest developments. I couldn't even take half a shift at work without Charles experiencing another sighting. What would it mean for him to be so dependent on me, being tethered to me like this? What would it mean for me? Suddenly, I felt exhausted. Letting my head fall back against the couch, I fell asleep.
I drove to the grocery store as fast as I could without risking being pulled over; it was the only store I could think Charles had meant to tell me he was at. I found him in the bakery section; he appeared to be counting doughnuts.
I slowed as I approached him, but my arrival still seemed to throw him. His look of recognition upon seeing me was followed quickly by a slight wobble and an expression of what looked like nausea. Suddenly, he put one hand on the pastry counter for support and dropped to the floor. He landed sitting, and I rushed over to kneel beside him.
"Charles," I whispered, trying not to draw attention. "Charles, are you okay?"
He was crying softly and trying to hide it. "I'm-" He took a long pause. "I'm here."
I didn't know what he meant by that, wasn't even sure he knew. "Charles, come on, we've got to get up." He allowed me to help him to his feet, allowed me to walk him out the door, but none of it could have been called a decision on his part. I felt like a puppeteer.
We drove back in silence until Charles offered meekly, "They only come around when you're not there."
I glanced over at him. "What?"
"The only time I see them now is when you're not with me."
I didn't know how to respond, and we drove the rest of the way in silence.
I was afraid Charles wouldn't want to come back inside, but he didn't make any effort to avoid it. When I tried to leave for my room, though, he grabbed my arm.
"Wait," he pleaded. I turned around and saw dread in his eyes. "Please," he added.
I nodded, understanding. I couldn't leave him alone now, at least not this soon after another incident. Charles sat back down on the couch; I switched the television on.
I sat down on the floor next to him, taking in these newest developments. I couldn't even take half a shift at work without Charles experiencing another sighting. What would it mean for him to be so dependent on me, being tethered to me like this? What would it mean for me? Suddenly, I felt exhausted. Letting my head fall back against the couch, I fell asleep.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Having left Charles alone for the first time since learning what was going on with him, I couldn't really concentrate at work. Thankfully, I'd been waiting tables for most of the last five years, so I managed to run much of my shift on little more than habit. My tips were markedly lower than usual, though, and I was glad for the end of the night.
I rushed through gathering everything up at my locker but stopped long enough to check my phone: one missed call, one message. The call had been from my home number. Hurrying to my car, I tossed short nods to a couple passing co-workers as I listened to the message.
"Hey, um, I'm at the store." Charles' voice was rushed, a tinge of nerves. The call had come through about two hours ago, and I tried to not concentrate on only the worst possibilities. It could have been anything, I told myself as I pulled out of the parking lot. He could have been going to the store and was checking to see if I wanted anything, he could have been letting me know where he'd gone in case I got home early, anything like that.
I edged the gas pedal down a little harder.
Finally arriving home and turning into my parking spot faster than I should have, I reached to turn off my headlights but my hand stopped just before reaching the switch. My headlights were cast on my front door, and some small shape was illuminated in the unnatural brightness. I looked around but saw no one outside.
Staring harder, I saw the shape was my house phone, leaned against the door. The feeling that washed into me was something like surprise and something just the opposite.
I rushed through gathering everything up at my locker but stopped long enough to check my phone: one missed call, one message. The call had been from my home number. Hurrying to my car, I tossed short nods to a couple passing co-workers as I listened to the message.
"Hey, um, I'm at the store." Charles' voice was rushed, a tinge of nerves. The call had come through about two hours ago, and I tried to not concentrate on only the worst possibilities. It could have been anything, I told myself as I pulled out of the parking lot. He could have been going to the store and was checking to see if I wanted anything, he could have been letting me know where he'd gone in case I got home early, anything like that.
I edged the gas pedal down a little harder.
Finally arriving home and turning into my parking spot faster than I should have, I reached to turn off my headlights but my hand stopped just before reaching the switch. My headlights were cast on my front door, and some small shape was illuminated in the unnatural brightness. I looked around but saw no one outside.
Staring harder, I saw the shape was my house phone, leaned against the door. The feeling that washed into me was something like surprise and something just the opposite.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Chapter Twenty-Seven
I woke up the next morning not looking forward to the day. I was going back to work, and that meant leaving Charles by himself for about six hours. He hadn't given any indication over the last couple days that there was anything to be worried about, but I couldn't stop replaying the first scene to which I'd returned after he showed up: Charles hunched over, his entire body shuddering with the effort to dispel the creature he had seen in my painting. I didn't imagine that image would leave me anytime soon, but today it was especially unnerving.
I had told him the night before what today's plans were, had made sure Charles knew I wouldn't be here. He insisted he would be fine, and actually did a fair job of convincing me. He was doing better, he reminded me, and the fact that he wasn't averse to talking about the situation was reassuring. Still, after the conversation, he seemed a little further distant; his eyes appeared to be looking through whatever was in front of them, either to something far off or something very close that no one else could see. I decided not to press the issue; there was nothing else I could do.
In an effort to help Charles keep his mind off the situation - what Dr. Lee would probably call an avoidance technique - I left him a twenty dollar bill and encouraged him to get whatever he wanted for dinner. There were a few restaurants in walking distance of the apartment and a grocery store just a few blocks away if he decided he wanted to make something himself.
As casually as I could, I mentioned that I had left my cell phone number next to the apartment phone but that I wouldn't have it with me while I was on the clock. We both knew what I was implying, I'm sure, but we did a good job of feigning mutual ignorance. I told him again I would be back just a little after 8 and stepped outside, leaving him in the care of the television. I shut the door slowly and watched it for a moment after it clicked shut. It felt like I had just handed in a project I wasn't sure was finished.
Getting in the car, I thought back on something Charles had told me while recounting how he had gotten to this point in his life: that he had used the other dimension as a place where he was supposed to be alone, that being alone didn't feel so bad when that was how things were meant to be. Even with all the convincing both he and I had done in preparation for today, I couldn't help imagining him slipping back into that way of thinking.
Still watching the apartment's front porch, I started the car.
I had told him the night before what today's plans were, had made sure Charles knew I wouldn't be here. He insisted he would be fine, and actually did a fair job of convincing me. He was doing better, he reminded me, and the fact that he wasn't averse to talking about the situation was reassuring. Still, after the conversation, he seemed a little further distant; his eyes appeared to be looking through whatever was in front of them, either to something far off or something very close that no one else could see. I decided not to press the issue; there was nothing else I could do.
In an effort to help Charles keep his mind off the situation - what Dr. Lee would probably call an avoidance technique - I left him a twenty dollar bill and encouraged him to get whatever he wanted for dinner. There were a few restaurants in walking distance of the apartment and a grocery store just a few blocks away if he decided he wanted to make something himself.
As casually as I could, I mentioned that I had left my cell phone number next to the apartment phone but that I wouldn't have it with me while I was on the clock. We both knew what I was implying, I'm sure, but we did a good job of feigning mutual ignorance. I told him again I would be back just a little after 8 and stepped outside, leaving him in the care of the television. I shut the door slowly and watched it for a moment after it clicked shut. It felt like I had just handed in a project I wasn't sure was finished.
Getting in the car, I thought back on something Charles had told me while recounting how he had gotten to this point in his life: that he had used the other dimension as a place where he was supposed to be alone, that being alone didn't feel so bad when that was how things were meant to be. Even with all the convincing both he and I had done in preparation for today, I couldn't help imagining him slipping back into that way of thinking.
Still watching the apartment's front porch, I started the car.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Chapter Twenty-Six
That night, I called Dr. Lee. Charles had been in a good mood all day, and as far as I knew, he hadn't seen anything of the shadows since that morning I'd found him in my car. Given his continued improvement, I was wondering if it might be a good idea to reschedule his next appointment.
On the phone with Dr. Lee, I explained my case. "Do you think it might be better to just see how this plays out? I mean, he's only been with me for a few days, but I can already tell things are getting a lot better."
"Adam," Dr. Lee replied, "I'm very happy that Charles is doing well, but I can't recommend abandoning therapy in favor of what, frankly, is an avoidance technique."
"I'm not saying we should cancel the appointments altogether," I corrected. "I just don't see it doing any good to remind him of the problem when he's not thinking about it. Maybe just push back the next appointment, see what happens."
"I wouldn't advise it. I can sense that you're enjoying your time with Charles, but don't let that shield you from the fact that he does have a serious condition that must be dealt with. I agreed to release Charles back into your care, as I don't believe he's a danger to anyone; you would be abusing that trust by attempting to make medical decisions on his behalf and against my advice."
"Okay," I conceded apologetically. I'd been expecting as much. "We'll see you in a few days, then."
"Yes. Goodbye, Adam."
Hanging up the phone, I considered one of the last things Dr. Lee had said about me enjoying my time with Charles. Had he been implying that I was keeping Charles around for my own benefit, like some kind of pet? It was nice having my friend back, I could admit, nice recapturing some of our younger spirit, but this was still all about Charles. Being together now was like going back to some of the best times of my life, but I hadn't forgotten that, ultimately, I was there to help my friend. Or maybe the two weren't mutually exclusive. Charles seemed to be enjoying himself in the same way I was, even given the circumstances that brought him here. I sensed an unspoken agreement in him that going our separate ways had been a mistake.
Our next appointment was in two days, though; my argument hadn't been able to sway Dr. Lee. And for Charles' sake, I hoped I wasn't right.
On the phone with Dr. Lee, I explained my case. "Do you think it might be better to just see how this plays out? I mean, he's only been with me for a few days, but I can already tell things are getting a lot better."
"Adam," Dr. Lee replied, "I'm very happy that Charles is doing well, but I can't recommend abandoning therapy in favor of what, frankly, is an avoidance technique."
"I'm not saying we should cancel the appointments altogether," I corrected. "I just don't see it doing any good to remind him of the problem when he's not thinking about it. Maybe just push back the next appointment, see what happens."
"I wouldn't advise it. I can sense that you're enjoying your time with Charles, but don't let that shield you from the fact that he does have a serious condition that must be dealt with. I agreed to release Charles back into your care, as I don't believe he's a danger to anyone; you would be abusing that trust by attempting to make medical decisions on his behalf and against my advice."
"Okay," I conceded apologetically. I'd been expecting as much. "We'll see you in a few days, then."
"Yes. Goodbye, Adam."
Hanging up the phone, I considered one of the last things Dr. Lee had said about me enjoying my time with Charles. Had he been implying that I was keeping Charles around for my own benefit, like some kind of pet? It was nice having my friend back, I could admit, nice recapturing some of our younger spirit, but this was still all about Charles. Being together now was like going back to some of the best times of my life, but I hadn't forgotten that, ultimately, I was there to help my friend. Or maybe the two weren't mutually exclusive. Charles seemed to be enjoying himself in the same way I was, even given the circumstances that brought him here. I sensed an unspoken agreement in him that going our separate ways had been a mistake.
Our next appointment was in two days, though; my argument hadn't been able to sway Dr. Lee. And for Charles' sake, I hoped I wasn't right.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Chapter Twenty-Five
The first thing I did the next morning was make sure Charles was in the apartment. I crept to the living room and found him still asleep on the couch, which was also reassuring in another way; Charles finally seemed to be settling down enough to put in a solid night's sleep. Pretending I didn't feel somewhat like I was babysitting a child, I sneaked back to the bathroom and got ready for the day.
Remarkably, the night before had maintained the lighthearted attitude set by my first-kiss confession. Charles and I had joked back and forth for another hour or so before resigning to our separate beds. I had amused him particularly with the story leading up to my kiss with Tracy and how much I had learned about unicorns in that time. As it turned out, no, they couldn't fly: that was ridiculous.
I wanted to keep Charles' spirits up as much as I could, so I decided to avoid mentioning anything about Dr. Lee or the shadows or anything that might trigger an adverse response. He was already starting to look a lot better than he had since he arrived, and I could only imagine a good night's sleep would do that much more for him. He seemed to be on the right path, so today was just going to be about keeping him from thinking about the situation.
With a towel around my waist, I stepped into the hallway and headed back to my bedroom when I heard a sound from the front of the apartment, a clunk of two hard objects coming together. Looking back over my shoulder then down at my towel, I slowly turned around and made my way back down the hall. I peeked around the corner to see Charles awake, setting the dining room table for breakfast. He looked up at me.
He had put out bowls and spoons for both of us and a carton of milk. He was walking back with a box of cereal when he saw me. "Oh," he said, "I made breakfast." He looked down at his handiwork. "Kinda."
I gave him a light laugh. "Thanks, Charles. Be out in a second." I walked back to my bedroom, thinking that things really were starting to look up, that maybe this was better for Charles than any plan Dr. Lee would come up with. Immediately, though, I wondered how long it could last. I had already traded away as many shifts as I could, and I would have to go back to work soon. Would Charles keep himself together when I wasn't around? And even if he did, were we just going to live together for the next - what? Year? Five years? Could I ever really be sure he was going to be okay on his own?
But today wasn't the day to think about that, I told myself. Today was just about keeping Charles from thinking about the situation, everything that I knew would now be filling my mind. Doing my best to ignore the responsibilities I was now shouldering, I got dressed.
Remarkably, the night before had maintained the lighthearted attitude set by my first-kiss confession. Charles and I had joked back and forth for another hour or so before resigning to our separate beds. I had amused him particularly with the story leading up to my kiss with Tracy and how much I had learned about unicorns in that time. As it turned out, no, they couldn't fly: that was ridiculous.
I wanted to keep Charles' spirits up as much as I could, so I decided to avoid mentioning anything about Dr. Lee or the shadows or anything that might trigger an adverse response. He was already starting to look a lot better than he had since he arrived, and I could only imagine a good night's sleep would do that much more for him. He seemed to be on the right path, so today was just going to be about keeping him from thinking about the situation.
With a towel around my waist, I stepped into the hallway and headed back to my bedroom when I heard a sound from the front of the apartment, a clunk of two hard objects coming together. Looking back over my shoulder then down at my towel, I slowly turned around and made my way back down the hall. I peeked around the corner to see Charles awake, setting the dining room table for breakfast. He looked up at me.
He had put out bowls and spoons for both of us and a carton of milk. He was walking back with a box of cereal when he saw me. "Oh," he said, "I made breakfast." He looked down at his handiwork. "Kinda."
I gave him a light laugh. "Thanks, Charles. Be out in a second." I walked back to my bedroom, thinking that things really were starting to look up, that maybe this was better for Charles than any plan Dr. Lee would come up with. Immediately, though, I wondered how long it could last. I had already traded away as many shifts as I could, and I would have to go back to work soon. Would Charles keep himself together when I wasn't around? And even if he did, were we just going to live together for the next - what? Year? Five years? Could I ever really be sure he was going to be okay on his own?
But today wasn't the day to think about that, I told myself. Today was just about keeping Charles from thinking about the situation, everything that I knew would now be filling my mind. Doing my best to ignore the responsibilities I was now shouldering, I got dressed.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Chapter Twenty-Four
Back at the apartment, I decided to order out for dinner; after our visit to Dr. Lee, I wasn't feeling up to cooking anything. The meeting hadn't been terrible or upsetting for Charles, but he never really seemed to be there with us; I got the feeling he thought it was just a waste of time. And if he wasn't going to give it a serious shot, I didn't know any other avenues to take in helping him.
I confirmed with Charles that Chinese food would make an acceptable meal but couldn't get him to commit to any dish in particular. He insisted that whatever I got would be fine, but just to be sure, I ordered sesame chicken, an old favorite of his from high school; I hoped he still liked it.
We ate in front of the television, watching some stand-up comedian with a guitar; I didn't find him particularly funny. Charles wasn't offering up any clues as to his own feelings, and I was getting anxious to break the silence.
"So," I said, "I've been wondering. With you being so popular, how many girls from our high school did you end up kissing?"
Charles seemed a little thrown by the abruptness of the question. Casting me a confused look, "I don't know. A few. Why?"
"Know who the first girl I kissed was? I don't think I told you."
"Who?"
"Tracy Bosworth." I was taking a bullet on this one in the hopes it would make Charles smile. Tracy - well, she wasn't my finest hour. She was actually a pretty sad case, as she had the looks and personality to allow her mobility into the upper classes of high school society. But the one thing that held her back, her own, personal glass ceiling, was the fact that she devoutly and unquestioningly believed unicorns were real; she worked this bit of trivia into maybe a third of her conversations, regardless of their original topic.
Having spent enough time with Tracy to eventually end up kissing her, I managed to learn the whole story. For her sixth birthday, her parents had put together a fairy tale themed party, complete with princess costumes, plastic swords for the boys, and what Tracy swore was a real, live unicorn. And thus, my first kiss was with a girl whose entire worldview had been irrevocably influenced by a pony wearing a cheap, plastic horn. I looked at Charles, hoping his reaction wouldn't be too harsh.
He just stared, his fork frozen in anticipation of its next scoop. "The unicorn girl?"
I looked back at the television, feigning extra embarrassment for his benefit, though I didn't have to pretend much. Charles' smile quickly broke through "Wow."
"Yeah, well, it could have been worse," I defended. "She was pretty cute."
He didn't let go. "Like, did she think they could fly and everything?"
"Hey, come on," I countered. "She wasn't that bad. And there's a perfectly acceptable reason she thought they were real."
"Yeah? What?"
"She really liked horses, and she was fucking insane."
Charles took a moment to gauge this response then burst out in laughter that reminded me of what it was like for us when we'd first met, the simple freedom of being with a true friend. I thought of all the days we'd spent together as kids, talking, laughing, not caring or worrying about anything at all, and with the memories, everything about the situation we were now in disappeared. For a moment, I think Charles found himself back there as well.
I confirmed with Charles that Chinese food would make an acceptable meal but couldn't get him to commit to any dish in particular. He insisted that whatever I got would be fine, but just to be sure, I ordered sesame chicken, an old favorite of his from high school; I hoped he still liked it.
We ate in front of the television, watching some stand-up comedian with a guitar; I didn't find him particularly funny. Charles wasn't offering up any clues as to his own feelings, and I was getting anxious to break the silence.
"So," I said, "I've been wondering. With you being so popular, how many girls from our high school did you end up kissing?"
Charles seemed a little thrown by the abruptness of the question. Casting me a confused look, "I don't know. A few. Why?"
"Know who the first girl I kissed was? I don't think I told you."
"Who?"
"Tracy Bosworth." I was taking a bullet on this one in the hopes it would make Charles smile. Tracy - well, she wasn't my finest hour. She was actually a pretty sad case, as she had the looks and personality to allow her mobility into the upper classes of high school society. But the one thing that held her back, her own, personal glass ceiling, was the fact that she devoutly and unquestioningly believed unicorns were real; she worked this bit of trivia into maybe a third of her conversations, regardless of their original topic.
Having spent enough time with Tracy to eventually end up kissing her, I managed to learn the whole story. For her sixth birthday, her parents had put together a fairy tale themed party, complete with princess costumes, plastic swords for the boys, and what Tracy swore was a real, live unicorn. And thus, my first kiss was with a girl whose entire worldview had been irrevocably influenced by a pony wearing a cheap, plastic horn. I looked at Charles, hoping his reaction wouldn't be too harsh.
He just stared, his fork frozen in anticipation of its next scoop. "The unicorn girl?"
I looked back at the television, feigning extra embarrassment for his benefit, though I didn't have to pretend much. Charles' smile quickly broke through "Wow."
"Yeah, well, it could have been worse," I defended. "She was pretty cute."
He didn't let go. "Like, did she think they could fly and everything?"
"Hey, come on," I countered. "She wasn't that bad. And there's a perfectly acceptable reason she thought they were real."
"Yeah? What?"
"She really liked horses, and she was fucking insane."
Charles took a moment to gauge this response then burst out in laughter that reminded me of what it was like for us when we'd first met, the simple freedom of being with a true friend. I thought of all the days we'd spent together as kids, talking, laughing, not caring or worrying about anything at all, and with the memories, everything about the situation we were now in disappeared. For a moment, I think Charles found himself back there as well.
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